It looks like an ordinary toilet crossed with a duck, but it comes complete with a whole new level of Disconcerting. For a start, when you sit down, THE SEAT IS PRE-WARMED.
And when your ass covers the sensor on the seat, A LITTLE FAN POWERS UP TO SUCK YOUR STINKS AWAY.
Then you get to play with the remote control:
|It goes BEEP every time, so don't imagine you're being subtle|
You can adjust water temperature, pressure, and position forward or back. THERE ARE OSCILLATING PROGRAMS.
Yes - not only is this device a boon for the hygiene-conscious vegetarian, say, but this toilet is designed for your aqua-based stimulation. Truly, what greater boon can civilisation offer than the gentle yet insistent pulse of a water jet about your throbbing sphincter?
|(Demonstration with clingfilm)|
|I'm not much the wiser, but it seems to be a shallow genital bath for which any medical claim is made.|
Finally, once you have
Those of you who know how long I spend on the toilet already, despair anew! I may never leave the bathroom now :-D
BONUS BATHROOM TECH:
|The shower vacuum|