Friday, 14 October 2016

Magnificent Seven - the best bits

I am not going to review The Magnificent Seven because it's a crap movie and I can't bear to waste my time enumerating its flaws right from (A) its evisceration of all depth and emotion from the originals, through to (Z) Vincent D'Onofrio's worst acting moment EVER: I've seen better rip-offs of Boromir's death scene on a LARP adventure.

Look, it was fluffy entertainment and looked pretty. And these are the pretty bits I really enjoyed:

You have to admit, actors in westerns are getting better-looking.
Denzil Washington of course, as leader Chisolm:

And Chris Pratt gets an honourable mention in passing:

But a big HEY! to Lee Byung-hun as Billy Rocks, the knifeman:

Oh oh oh

 And in case you wondered what he looked like out of his costume:

Hell, I might even watch G.I. Joe now
But winner of Most Beautiful Man in the Movie is Martin Sensmeier as Red Harvest.

Strike that - he might be the Most Beautiful Man in the World. HAVE YOU SEEN HIM WITH LONG HAIR?

Okay, that's it - I need a little lie-down now!
Then I'm off to play Deadlands.

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