God Told Me to Do It

I should stop listening to gods, you know.

Heroes

The TV series Heroes has finished airing on terrestrial here in the UK, so for the record I thought I'd build a little shrine to the two characters I thought the most beautiful.

Isaac Mendez (played by Santiago Cabrera)

Dr Mohinder Suresh (played by Sendhil Ramamurthy).

My First Tattoo

Lower back, done on Saturday 24th November 2007.
Tattoo artist was Theresa Gordon-Wade, who is really nice as well as being a great tattooist.

And they called it Puppet Love

Yes, this (the one on the right, I should point out) was my first crush - aged about 6 I should think. A hairy blue monster. Sweet natured, innocent and a bit exasperated by life.

Sesame Street is an awesome programme: educational, witty, humane and fun. I grew up on it because most English-language TV in Hong Kong was imported from America at the time I lived there . And I still love Grover.

Funny-Shaped Balls

This is Augustin Pichot, rugby player and captain of Argentina's national side. He converted me to watching rugby.

Veraine

This is actually a photo of Gerard Butler playing Attila in the eponymous TV mini-series. Bad series. But it came out sometime after "Divine Torment" was published and when I saw the cover of the DVD I went "Bloody hell! - that's Veraine!"

Which is the whole reason I have this enormous crush on a relatively obscure Scottish actor. Well, he's not so obscure now.

To be 100% Veraine he'd have to have greying hair of course, and black eyes not grey (Veraine's north-Indian-ish). Still, he's 90% right: my ultimate sexual hero.

There's a clip on the extras of the Dracula 2001 DVD showing GB reading for the title role while still wearing the Attila long hair and eyeliner. It's probably the sexiest thing I've ever seen. Secondary brain (the one in my knickers) kicks in and overrides primary one. I have no interest in vampires, but I'd let that one kill me stone dead.

Pat Rafter, Wet.

Lust Bites T-Shirt

Divine Torment back in print this week

Divine Torment is back in print from 8th August (UK - it's October for US readers I think). Hooray!

It has a snazzy new cover (left). Okay, so it's a bit cheesy... Like brie. And neither cover model looks anything like my heroes. But at least it says "This is a fantasy novel, dudes!" - unlike the godawful 1st edition cover (below). Oh man is the new one an improvement!

My favourite is still the Japanese cover (bottom), which has actually been drawn to order by someone who's read the book. They've got the reddish hair and the armour (although they've exaggerated how kinky the latter is).

Still, the main thing is it's back on sale. And it's mine. And I love it!

Read an excerpt on Lust Bites, on the last Friday of this month - and maybe win a free copy.

Horny Boyz!

Extract: 'The Dragon's Bride'

'The Dragon's Bride' appears in Cruel Enchantment, my short story collection.


‘Tell me,’ said Oromon; 'are you considered attractive by the standards of your people?'

Sheldi looked down at herself, at the firm curves so generous that they were almost a joke. Noblewomen of the city aspired to be tiny and fragile. She remembered the barbed ‘She has the physique of a dancing girl, not of a lady!’ hissed deliberately just within her hearing, a lifetime away. ‘Actually, I’m thought to be too tall,’ she told the dragon.

‘Not now,’ said Oromon, bringing his head in close to her. His hot breath whistled around her feet. Suddenly his tongue – forked like a snake’s and pale blue – slid from between the mesh of his teeth and flickered up the line of her stomach. Sheldi gasped and put out her hand without thinking onto the scaled ridge between his nostrils. It was warm.

‘What are you doing?’ she whispered.

‘Smelling you,’ he replied. ‘Kneel down: you will be more stable. It’s necessary,’ he added as she obeyed helplessly: ‘My people have excellent hearing and vision, but a poor sense of smell. And the scent of your kind is not very like that of my own. But close enough. Ahh.’

His tongue brushed across her breasts, moving in and out of his mouth, tracing a path across her shivering skin from throat to belly, exploring under her arms and across her lips. Sheldi shut her eyes and submitted, yielding to the dry, delicate touch. When it slid between her parted thighs she made no sound, though her eyes flew open. She felt the tip of the tongue questing in the moist folds of her flesh and realised with silent shock how adroit a forked tongue could be at parting and spreading that flesh.

‘Open your legs,’ breathed Oromon, withdrawing for a moment, and when she complied her returned to probe deeper. And she was wet, she suddenly knew: soaking wet. His tongue was drawing slick trails of moisture down from her vagina across her thighs and she could smell herself. She flushed with shame. The dragon-tongue slipped into the hot passage of her sex, flexed there and withdrew – and Sheldi bit down on a tiny moan.

‘Not entirely unpleasant, then,’ Oromon chuckled; then when she refused to reply he stabbed again with a teasing caress that jerked a cry from her lips and left her shaking.

‘Oh please,’ she whispered.

Lust Man Standing

I love this picture. I could smile at it for hours.

The TV programme it comes from is Last Man Standing and the contestant is Rajko Radovic.

I wrote some stuff about my sad warrior obsession in my sparkly new Myspace Blog, if you're interested.

Brendan Fraser

Saving my lovely Brendan Fraser sidebar picture for future generations....

I got it from http://www.provocateuse.com/ by the way. One of my favourite sites on the Web. Visit it today!

How long do you think he can hold his breath for?

Grrrrl Power

Blogger was playing me about when we did a GirlCrush Wednesday over at Lust Bites, so I couldn't post any pictures. So very belatedly, here's a selection of the women I fancy. You may just spot a theme.


Claudia Black in Pitch Black - but I loved her best as Aeryn Sun in Farscape.

Michelle Rodriguez in Resident Evil.

Milla Jovovich, also in Resident Evil. What a hardchick-fest that film is!

And Angelina Jolie, of course. If there is a God, that's what She looks like.