Wednesday, 8 May 2013

Bitchin Crush

I have recently developed this enormous shameful hot crush on Nadia Giosia, star of Bitchin' Kitchen.



It wasn't love at first sight. I don't even like the Food Network, which is mostly full of grotesque American men force-feeding themselves enough greasy dead animal to feed a third world country for a week. But sometimes I surf past an actual cookery show, and I lingered on Bitchin Kitchen because I was intrigued by the title. I saw Nadia G and to be absolutely honest, my first thought was "Brassy Brooklyn blonde, so totally not my type."


Then I watched her in action, because I was too tired to haul my ass off to bed. And now, late at night when Mr Ashbless isn't around, I can't help myself sneaking a lecherous peek, and watching in guilty fascination ...



Reasons to like Nadia G:

  • She is kinda scary. 
  • She isn't from Brooklyn, she's Canadian - I believe the accent is a total fake.
  • She isn't a chef, she's a comedian.
  • (But the food actually looks pretty good. Not that I'm watching for the food, but it isn't actively off-putting)
  • When she talks her face gets all screwed up and does weird things.
  • Sometimes the Crazy shows in her eyes and she goes off on a total rant.
  • She keeps a stable of underdressed male totty on the show for no reason other than their entertainment value.
  • She wears the most unsuitable clothes for cooking in, and six-inch stilletos, and ghastly nail-polish.
  • She has perfected the "come fuck me" look as she says "Let's plate this."

 So I say surrender to the schtick, and enjoy. You've got to admit it's hotter than Man versus Food.


3 comments:

  1. I wasn't familiar with her, but I watched the clip just now to check out the accent (yes, the accent). It sounds like the Canadian analog to the accent some second-or-third-or-nth-generation Italian Americans express—though, lest you think me too clever, I note that I say the above having learned that she's Canadian (thanks to you) and of Italian descent (thanks to her).

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  2. Yes, that make sense. It's not a "fake" accent in the sense that it's put on for TV, but is deliberatedly affected as part of a social identity. I wouldn't have guessed at Canadian if I hadn't read it, that's all I'm saying!

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  3. I can see where you're coming from. The whole ambience of the clip and the script is amusing, and turns out somewhere between goth gourmet and fetish food. Especially the idea of the 'breakup meal' and the line about 'what else are you supposed to do with emotions other than eat them?'

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